Fifty Million Runelvys Fans

Why is nobody covering this story? It's been four days since the signing was announced, and I'm just now seeing mention of this? The Sox signed Runelvys Hernandez! The Sox signed Runelvys Hernandez! Not only that- they managed to convince him that the whole "secret weapon" tactic, hiding him on Pawtucket's roster, was the best way to psyche out the competition. They did it at Christmastime, so nobody was really paying attention. No one believed that a 300-pound castoff from the Kansas City Royals with a lifetime 5.38 ERA would tip the balance of the American League East, but that's just what might be happening. Well, maybe tipping the balance is a poor choice of words. But look at the facts- as soon as the Sox signed Hernandez (giving them at least 9 starters in Pawtucket, by my count), the Yankees snap into action. They realize that now their rotation has to be that much better. So if you're Brian Cashman, what's your counter move to the Sox signing of Runelvys Hernandez (I love that name)? Exactly. You offer Randy Johnson up for trade- perhaps back to the Diamondbacks.

Whew. I'm exhausted. I'm sure it's got nothing to do with the four beers and three pieces of apple pie I had yesterday afternoon. It's got everything to do with the devastating signing of Runelvys Hernandez and the exciting implications. Could somebody please let me know when his plane is arriving in Providence, so I can go greet it like those nutballs all did with Matsuzaka? How do you spell "konichiwa" in Spanish?

Ok- so just reviewing, Boston is looking at potential starters of:
Schilling
Beckett
Matsuzaka
Papelbon
Wakefield
with backup/AAA options including Tavarez, Lester, Hansack, Gabbard, Pauley, Snyder, Zink! (his name really ought to be punctuated), Alvarez, and now Hernandez. Before you make a comment about how ludicrous that is to be discussing our 14th and 15th starting pitcher option, think back a moment to last summer. This isn't such a stupid exercise. Depth is power.

Down the interstate a bit, the Yankees are probably looking at:
Mussina
Wang
Johnson (?)
Pettitte
Pavano (?)
with Kei Igawa and Philip Hughes (he scare me) waiting in the wings.

Right now, with health being equal, I really like our rotation better. Both Mussina and Pettitte were decent last year, but they're another year older, and Pettitte is returning from his vacation in the NL. Pavano was not wretched in his 17 appearances back in 2005, but I'm not worried about him. What I'm saying is, he's no Runelvys Hernandez.